Wednesday, 6 July 2011

My Worst Ever Films

Poison Ivy and Mr Freeze ham it up. Photo courtesy of; taken by schumachergirl1956

I may write a few posts like this, in which criticise the garbage that sometimes smears its excrement on our movie screens. Bad movies can be enjoyable guilty pleasures to watch, however, so here are a few that you may enjoy:

Avatar: The Last Airbender

This movie makes no sense despite looking fairly cool. It also had awful child actors in it.

Batman and Robin

A classic stinker. I love watching this film for laughs. It was the fourth film in the series and second directed by Joel Schumacher and it was awful, a rare blight on 1997; a great year for entertainment.

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy: Mammals, a day of reckoning is coming. That's right, the same plants and flowers that saw you crawl from the primordial soup will reclaim the planet. And there will be no-one to protect you.

Gossip Gerty: You must be new in town. In Gotham City, Batman and Robin protect us... even from plants and flowers.

Robin: Where's the snowman?

Batgirl: Maybe he melted.

Batman: No, he's just hibernating.

Mr. Freeze: I will blanket the city in endless winter. First Gotham, and then the world.

Poison Ivy: Just what I had in mind. Everything dead on earth, except us. A chance for Mother Nature to start again. Behold, the dawn of a new age. My mutant plants have the strength of the deadliest animals. Once you have frozen mankind, these babies will overrun the globe, and we shall rule them, for we will be the only two people left in the world.

Mr. Freeze: Adam and Evil!

Ms. B. Haven: Freezy, I'm feeling hot.

Mr. Freeze: I find that unlikely.

Ms. B. Haven: Okay, so my hair is brittle and my skin is dry. I'd wear the blizzards just to have you. You're the most perfect man I've ever known. What do you say we heat things up?

Mr. Freeze: My passion thaws for my pride alone.

Ms. B. Haven: Ooh. Talk about your cold shoulder.

Batman to Mr Freeze: Mr Freeze, the heat is on.

Mr. Freeze: In this universe, there's only one absolute ... everything freezes!
What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age.
Mercy? I'm afraid my condition has left me cold to your pleas of mercy.
If revenge is a dish best served cold, then put on your Sunday finest.
We aim to ... freeze.
You won't be sending me to the cooler!

Town and Country

Bad acting, complete trite.

Apparently Beatty was ocnfused with what the film was about.

Alistair Anderson

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